Processing our Grief for the Earth

After a busy holiday season, I have been giving myself a bit of a break, just absorbing the beauty of the season and allowing myself rest.

I am deeply grateful that the Intuitive Guide Certificate program is almost full, with a group of lovely people joining me for the next 10 months. It has been truly amazing to hear the hopes and dreams of the brave souls who have decided to say "yes" to this journey, and to be able to support them in getting there.

And yet the cycles of life continue. Sometimes things happen to us that are totally unexpected and that throw us for a loop.

I awoke one morning last week to loud clanking sounds, and to machines plowing through the forest behind our house. When I realized what was happening, the next few days became filled with a sense of helplessness and grief due to a situation totally out of my control (a lesson in control for me, to be sure).

The machines began cutting down a number of trees on the property (40 acres of woods) next to ours, for the selective cutting of timber. This brought me an overwhelming and maddening feeling of sadness I have not felt in some time.

Every day for the past 3 years I have gone into the woods on daily walks with my dog, hugging a tree each time and sitting, meditating and doing yoga by streams.

This felling of trees (and destruction of a magical area of rocks by a stream) broke my heart. I cried for a few days about it, spending time by the area that was once the peaceful trickling waterfall, and apologizing for not doing better in saving it.

It was amazing at how much grief I felt. The aching in my heart was so intense, so visceral. It was as if someone had died.

I realized how strong a connection I had formed with the water, the trees and the space that had become one of my safe, sacred spots. It felt so painful that this destruction had happened, and that there was nothing I could do about it.

Sometimes we just can't feel better, and sometimes there is no "positive" aspect to a situation. It just sucked. 

I allowed myself to just grieve. And yet, when I saw my kids grieving as well, I tried to find the light in the situation. Maybe there would be more trails for us to ski on. Maybe this would help the forest regenerate (as there had been lots of deadfall).

When I was ready, I went out into the area that was now a clearing, placed a flower on the sacred area and said goodbye.

I paused and listened to what I felt the remaining trees wanted to share with me. They told me, “We’re still here. We are here to be of service.”

And I was reminded of the cycle of life, and how our home is made of trees, our wood stove is fueled by trees and we live here in a space where lots of trees were once cut down.

The forest reminded me that it will return. Other parts of the stream are still there, and it will recover.

While allowing myself to mourn the loss of what was, I also am doing my best to put it into perspective. I feel better now, and have a sense of acceptance of it all.

So tonight, in the Circle of Light bi-monthly meditation, I will lead us in a guided meditation on The Messages of Nature to help us really connect with the natural world in a deep way, finding hope in the grief we may have. Please join me here on Zoom or in the Souls Gathering Together Facebook group, Wednesday, January 10th from 8-8:20ish pm EST.

Below is a writing reflection that you may find helpful in processing your own negative emotions, an excerpt from my book, Tools for the Awakening Soul: A Guide to Activate Your Intuition and Uncover Your Life's Purpose.

May we allow ourselves to miss what once was, yet find hope for the possibilities of what can come. 

Releasing Heavy Feelings
 

Take a moment to reflect on any negative emotions, using the cues here to guide you. Feel free to skip or expand on any section. Elaborate on any emotions that come up. Keep going until you feel done. When you feel a release, you'll know. 
 

I feel:
 
I feel:

I feel:
 
I feel:
 

Underline some of the feelings you expressed in the previous sentences (frustrated, confused, sad, etc.). This can help to clearly see and separate from them as an "observer" of your life. Now continue.
 

I feel like:
 
I am worried about:

I am scared that: 
 

Now let's try to move onward and upward.... What lesson might there be in this experience?

Even though it's hard, how can I accept some part of my present situation?

 
I want:
 
I will:
 
I still wonder:
 
I ask for: 

 
What else is still coming up? Express it here, or continue to use the I want, I ask for, I will, I feel statements as guides:
 
 
Hopefully you now feel some release and separation from your emotions. You may want to continue clearing heavy emotions through verbal processing (talking with a trusted friend), moving your body (dancing, punching something), or doing something creative (like drawing or painting). Crying and yelling - not at someone but just in general - are incredibly effective emotional releases. And, you can do this writing reflection as many times as you like.
 
After a few days/weeks or so, you may find that you feel better and even healed through the inner work you’re doing! If not, don't give up - this is a temporary situation and it will get better. You are loved. You are supported. And you, and all of us here on Earth, are on a path to evolve. The heavy emotions are just part of learning and growing in the human experience.